Fic : The Dangers of Paperwork
Jul. 15th, 2010 09:34 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
menolly_auTitle: The Dangers of Paperwork
Author: menolly_au
Words: 441
Rating : G
Summary : Wilson hurts himself doing his paperwork
Written for Camp Sick!Wilson Ordinary Things challenge.
House barged into Wilson's office and then stopped dead at the sight in front of him.
Wilson was seated behind his desk, blood steadily dripping down a finger and onto the paperwork spread out before him. He was fishing around in a drawer, presumably for something to stop the flow of blood.
“You're bleeding.”
“Your observational powers are amazing, no wonder you are a world acclaimed diagnostician.”
Wilson found some tissues and wrapped a couple around his finger.
“What did you do?”
“I didn't do anything House.” Wilson peered at the offending digit which was stubbornly refusing to stop bleeding.
“Your finger started bleeding all by itself?” House asked sceptically. “I'll call the minions, we have a patient but I'm sure we can fit you in. That guy is only paralysed and bleeding from his ears, nothing that can't wait.”
Wilson sighed. This wasn't going to end well.
“I cut myself.”
“Ah, that explains the copious amount of blood. It doesn't explain the fact that there are no knives or other sharp objects on your desk.”
“I cut myself on an envelope.”
House stared at him.
“It was a very sharp envelope,” Wilson explained defensively.
House kept staring.
“I was trying to seal it, and I ran my finger along the flap and well...”
The bleeding had stopped and now he was trying to apply a band-aid clumsily with his right hand.
“Here, let me.”
House came forward and applied the band-aid to the wounded finger while Wilson watched him, eyes wide in surprise.
“The great Doctor House doing first aid. I must tell Cuddy, she'll probably put you in the hospital bulletin as Doctor of the Month.”
House scowled at him.
“Can't have all those death certificates getting bloody...” House trailed off, eyes staring into space.
“Paperwork... bleeding... Argentina... new wife...”
Without another word he turned and limped off, bellowing for his minions.
Wilson sighed, apparently he had just supplied another epiphany for his friend.
“Glad to have helped House,” he muttered. “I'll be fine now.”
He picked up the envelope that had caused all the trouble. He eyed the flap warily and then reached for the scotch tape dispenser on the desk. As he pulled some tape off he caught his finger on the sharp serrated edge, slicing a neat cut across the top.
House burst into his office.
“Hey Wilson, come see this! We're going to cut this guy's ...”
House trailed off, staring at the bleeding finger and then back to Wilson.
“Seriously ?!”
Wilson could only nod.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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Date: 2010-07-15 03:16 pm (UTC)And this: “Hey Wilson, come see this! We're going to cut this guy's ...” - priceless!
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Date: 2010-07-15 08:16 pm (UTC)no subject
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Date: 2010-07-15 08:57 pm (UTC)“Your observational powers are amazing, no wonder you are a world acclaimed diagnostician.”
This stuff could be right out of the script. :)
Very cute and funny. And House's epiphany was right on schedule too!
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Date: 2010-07-17 08:23 am (UTC)*mems*
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