Fic : Wilson's Five Point Plan

[menolly_au]

Title: Wilson's Five Point Plan
Characters: House & Wilson
Rating: G
Words Five connected drabbles of 100 words each
Warnings: None
Summary: Wilson wants to stay with House, and he has a five point plan to make it happen.

Author's Note : Started writing this after some discussion on house_rewind about the second season episode Clueless - when Wilson moves in with House. Finished it and posting it in an attempt to clear some WIPs off my hard drive. Quotes from Clueless and Safe)




1. Move In - Could I stay with you for a few days?

He can't stay in the house. The marriage is dead, it's been dead for months, Julie's confession didn't do much more than bury the corpse. He's been desperately hanging on (because, three divorces? really?) - but now he has to move on, and out. House threw out hints earlier that his couch might be available in the case of an emergency - well, not so much hints but dire warnings of such a fate befalling him, but Wilson will take it. House has beer and TIVO and a couch with a warm blanket, and that's enough for him right now.


2. Allow for Contingencies - I found an apartment. I can move in on Monday.

It's disappointing, but not really a surprise, that it's only one night before House is telling him it's time to move out. The thing with House is that House views everything in terms of how it affects his own level of misery, he weighs pain against pleasure to find a balance. Wilson has to find something that House wants. In the meantime he makes a contingency plan because he's always liked having an escape route. He calls around and finds a guy who knows a guy. Now he's got until Monday to tip the Scales of House in his favour.


3. Feed the Beast - Don’t you ever eat anything besides canned soup and peanut butter?

Wilson surveys the meagre contents of House's kitchen, shakes his head in dismay and then goes shopping. Julie hated cooking so Wilson went to classes, it's something he enjoys and as he picks up a whole pantry full of ingredients he starts to plan some menus in his head. He'll start with the stuffed peppers tonight, those have never failed him. He makes sure he's tucking into a nice plate of them when House comes home, hungry and tired. House doesn't say he likes them, because he's House, but his fork comes back for seconds and that's enough for Wilson.


4. Sealing the Deal - If you want someone to clean your apartment, it’s on me.

Wilson needs to show House that there are certain advantages to having him stay, like good food, a clean apartment and someone to talk to. So he starts with a container of macadamia nut pancakes, and continues with packed lunches - made more enticing to House by the post-it notes warning him off. Nothing appeals to House as much as taking something he thinks belongs to Wilson. Wilson volleys House's verbal barbs back to him with the ease of long practice and when Lady's cleaning provides the key to the mystery Wilson knows the deal is as good as done.


5. Let House Think He's Won - I said it's fine if you stay.

Wilson checks the answering machine when he gets in from work. It's Blake, the guy with the apartment. He smiles as he listens to the message. Perfect. Before House gets home he makes a few goodies to stock the fridge with, cleans up a bit and then lies down on the couch, his blanket covering him. He listens as House replays the message. There's a few moments of silence, and he pictures House standing there, stolen food in his hand, looking at him. The message is deleted. Wilson continues to pretend to be asleep but inwardly he's smiling.

Mission accomplished.

Comments

[deelaundry.livejournal.com]

I like it when fanfic writers remember that Wilson is clever. ♥ Thank you for this!

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

Appropriate icon is appropriate :) Thanks, glad you enjoyed it :)

[rividori.livejournal.com]

Devious Wilson! Brilliant! And it fits perfectly.

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

Wilson can be very devious indeed :) Thanks! Glad you liked it, thanks for reading!

[chocolate-frapp.livejournal.com]

hahaha sneaky Wilson!!

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

He is a bit sneaky here isn't he ;) Thanks for reading!

[readingrat.livejournal.com]

Perfect. I think Wilson can be much more manipulative than House because unlike House, he doesn't feel the need to crow about it afterwards, so people aren't on the alert.

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

Good point, Wilson does his work quietly :) Thanks for reading!

[srsly-yes.livejournal.com]

Wonderful to wake up to scheming!Wilson. I'm sure House is too. ♥

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

I think House would appreciate Wilson's plan if he knew about it :) Thanks for reading!

[rslhilson.livejournal.com]

Heh, who doesn't love manipulative bitch!Wilson? This was absolutely perfect - kudos! <3

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

Thank you! Glad you liked it, thanks for reading!

[sassyjumper.livejournal.com]

Hee, this is great! I love me some Manipulative Bitch Wilson. I especially love the last one; it makes perfect sense. Why would Wilson give House's home number instead of his own cell phone? And if he gave House's number, why wouldn't he check the messages? And how could he not wake up? (I guess these are some of the questions that came up on house-rewind? :) )

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

All good questions :) Wilson did truly have impressive powers of sleep in that episode :) Glad you thought it made sense, thanks for reading!

[yarroway.livejournal.com]

I love manipulative!Wilson. I especially like how Wilson lets House think he has won.

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

Life's a lot easier if House thinks he's won ;) Thanks for reading!

[cuddyclothes.livejournal.com]

Ah, this just made me melt. I can't tell you how wonderful it is to read a good H/W story again. And seeing this sequence through Wilson's eyes. Thank you!!

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

I do love that icon of cautious!Fletcher :) Thanks for reading, glad you enjoyed it!

[flywoman.livejournal.com]

Ahahahahaha, what a manipulative bitch :DDDD I loved this!

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

He is a bit isn't he ;) Thanks, glad you liked it!

[pinigir.livejournal.com]

Loved it! Loved Wilson's deviousness. :-)

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

Thanks! Glad you enjoyed it!

[resm.livejournal.com]

I'll never be able to watch this episode again without thinking of this fic, and that's not a bad thing! Loved this from start to finish, esp because, regardless of canon not running with H/W (although we did get them literally running off into the sunset together), this is so believable.

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

Thanks :) I'm glad you found it believable, thanks for reading!

[barefootpuddles.livejournal.com]

Ah, that's perfect. Manipulative bitch indeed. As soon as you started laying it out I could totally see it. You worked it beautifully with Wilson's relaxed and assured tone. I also loved the tinge of disappointment at being asked to move out so soon and also the line Nothing appeals to House as much as taking something he thinks belongs to Wilson.

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

I thought Wilson sounded a bit disappointed when House kicked him out the first morning (because really, House?) It's a shame Wilson ended up moving out anyway a few eps later (and we never saw it).

Thanks for reading, glad you enjoyed it :)

[mireya-11.livejournal.com]

I got too used to read Wilson as a floppy and kind of stupid man, you made me remember that he is definetly not.
Adore you <3

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

Thank you! Yes, Wilson is definitely not stupid - although you're right, it's easy to fall into the trap of thinking of him as the not so smart sidekick. Glad you liked the fic :)

[(Anonymous)]

Yeaap. I do not like it, I adore it!