Fic : Picking Up the Laundry

[menolly_au]

Title:Picking Up the Laundry
Words: 924
Rating : G
Spoilers : For the general storyline of the first couple of episodes of season 8
Characters : Wilson, Foreman
Warnings : None
Genre : Humour (hopefully!)
Summary : When House embarks on a campaign to win back Wilson's friendship Foreman discovers that Wilson isn't quite what he seems. A more light hearted look at the current situation :)




"Doctor Wilson, a word with you?" Foreman entered Wilson's office, closing the door firmly behind him. Wilson was sitting behind his desk busily writing away, although Foreman couldn't see what he was working on. Foreman made a mental note to put aside some money in the next budget to buy the poor guy a computer.

He did a double take as he came further into the room. It seemed like half of the available floor space was taken up by an enormous fruit basket, which seemed to have beer bottles coming out of it at odd angles.

"Foreman, what can I do for you?" Wilson looked up at him genially, a polite smile on his lips.

Foreman poked at the fruit basket, discovering an expensive bottle of whiskey lurking at the bottom, and a magazine on restoring barns of all things. He pulled it out, wondering if there was porn lurking behind the innocent cover, but no, it was a magazine on restoring barns.

"Where did this," he waved his arm at the lavish basket, "come from?"

"It just appeared there this morning, no note on it."

"And these..." Foreman nodded at two large movie posters, complete with glass frames, propped up against the wall. One was for The Green Mile, the other for the Shawshank Redemption.

"They came yesterday. No note on those either." Wilson's expression was bland and pleasant, but Foreman wasn't fooled.

"House?"

"Almost certainly."

"Why is he sending you gifts? I thought you two weren't friends any more?"

"He's 'winning me back'. Monday's gift was two tickets to the monster truck rally next weekend. On Tuesday he sent Doctor Adams to my office with instructions to tell me that I could do anything I wanted with her, she was my slave for the day."

"Okay...you know that's not legal don't you?" Foreman was imagining a sexual harassment suit being filed as they spoke, he didn't appear to be immune from normal employment laws as Cuddy had seemed to be, he'd have to email her and ask her what her secret was one day.

"And Wednesday he did my clinic hours," Wilson finished, ignoring his question. "He's also done some research for a paper I started writing while he was...away, and obtained some notes on some trials being conducted at the Mayo Clinic which I'm sure nobody outside that hospital is supposed to have access to. On Thursday there were two hundred balloon animals all over the children's oncology ward."

Foreman stared at him, astonished. "He must really want to be your friend again."

"Apparently he does." Wilson smiled fondly. "He had his hair cut short this morning, I told him once he looked good with a buzz cut."

Foreman looked at Wilson's fairly short hair cut but refrained from mentioning it.

"And when do you think you might forgive him and be his friend again? Sometime before hell freezes over or the twelve drummers drumming appear in the lobby?"

Wilson smiled, "what makes you think I haven't?"

"You've forgiven him?"

"Of course."

"So, why aren't you friends any more?"

"Who says we aren't?"

"Well, you did...wait, you're playing him?" Foreman stared at Wilson who kept on smiling, a satisfied look on his face. "You're stringing him along...but what about your wrist? He nearly ran you over!"

Wilson shrugged. "Of all the things House has done to me over the years, that was barely a blip on the radar. No big deal. It's not like he was trying to hurt anyone, he was just having a bad day."

Foreman shook his head. "It seems a bit...mean," he finished weakly. He couldn't believe he was paying any consideration to House's feelings and it seemed that neither could Wilson, he raised an incredulous eyebrow.

"If I forgave him straight away he'd think it was suspicious and spend the next six months looking for the catch. This way he'll think he's earned it and relax."

"And in the meantime you get all these..." Foreman waved his hand at the room.

"Hey, monster truck rally tickets, those are hard to get. As soon as I 'forgive' him he'll be back to his usual asshole self - might as well get something out of the deal while I can."

Foreman stared at him, before realising that his mouth was hanging open in a manner not in keeping with his new elevated status in the hospital. He'd known Wilson for years but had always mentally dismissed him as the dumb but loyal friend, as cuddly as a teddy bear and about as harmless. It seemed he was wrong.

"Was there anything else, Foreman?"

Foreman shook his head wordlessly, he couldn't even remember why he came here.

He left the office, only to fall over something on the floor just outside the door. Lying on the ground, he looked around to see a flock of pink flamingos lined up along the corridor. They were in pairs, one half of each pair was dressed in a little labcoat and tie, the other one had a cane attached to its wing. When he looked up he caught a glimpse of a scruffy doctor limping quickly out of sight.

Foreman let his head drop back down to the carpet with a thud. He had the feeling that this was going to be a very long year.

Comments

[damigella-314.livejournal.com]

Foreman made a mental note to put aside some money in the next budget to buy the poor guy a computer.
LMAO! You really hate handwriting! [Actually, when I write just playing English I never handwriting either.]

LOL at the slave for the day.

as cuddly as a teddy bear and about as harmless. It seemed he was wrong.
Only about the second half.

The flamingoes! OhMyGod paired flamingoes with labcoat+tie and cane! This needs to be an icon yesterday (and I still hope it will be, from your viewpoint).

Thanks for providing lighter fare for once.

[Ehm.. care to explain the title? I'm not even sure what it means, even though I supposedly understand the individual words.]

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

Lol - yeah I just hate seeing Wilson just sitting in his office scribbling away all the time - give the poor guy something else to do :)

The title, I dunno, I was really really stuck for a title for this one, to the point of not posting it last night because I couldn't think of a title. It comes from the Mirror Mirror episode where Wilson says House would 'pick up his laundry' if he asked him to, illustrating that Wilson is really in charge of their 'relationship' - which he is in this story :)

[damigella-314.livejournal.com]

One more good reason not to use my iPad to surf while brushing my teeth for the night: I read
Wilson is really in charge of their 'relationship'
and as a result I had to clean the whole mirror from a frothy mixture of saliva and toothpaste.

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

I thought I was addicted to my iPad but I do manage to put it down for teeth brushing :) LOl - I hope the iPad suffered no damage :)

[writerdot.livejournal.com]

LMAO! Yay for this! I love that you included the discussion on the computer vs handwriting thing.

Thank you for the laugh! It took my headache down a notch. :-)

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

Yeah I had to get the handwriting discussion in there somewhere :)

Glad it gave you a laugh, hope the headache goes away soon (maybe a little Wilson will cure it in about um...four hours and however many minutes:)

Thanks for reading!

[writerdot.livejournal.com]

Oh yes, I can't wait for tonight. I'm able to try and ignore my headache when I remember that RSL will be on my tv screen in 4 hours. lol.

[damigella-314.livejournal.com]

(hugs, passes over cup of tea)
Let's hope the next episode will make you feel better. Watch it for me while I sleep :).

[writerdot.livejournal.com]

Thank you, honey. I definitely will. :-)

[flywoman.livejournal.com]

Hee, manipulative bitch!Wilson and all kinds of funny meta commentary on the absurdities of the show! Thank you, thank you!

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

I must admit I am partial to a little manipulative!Wilson :)

Thanks for reading!

[writerdot.livejournal.com]

I just had to say I love your icon. lol. So pretty.

[flywoman.livejournal.com]

INORITE? (This was cropped from the pic that cuddyclothes took of us after "Born Yesterday.")

[cuddyclothes.livejournal.com]

If you knew where his hand is, you'd know why he's smiling. ;-)

[flywoman.livejournal.com]

Actually, if you knew where his hand is, you'd know why I'm smiling ;).

[srsly-yes.livejournal.com]

Absolutely squee-alicious! You really got inside House and Wilson's heads to figure out perfect gifts. (I bet in RL you're a gift giving whiz.) Also loved the reference from the discussion about Wilson's incessant writing.

*mems*

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

(I bet in RL you're a gift giving whiz.)

I wish I was (: Maybe I should ask House for some tips :)

I can't wait to see today whether Wilson is writing writing writing when House goes to see him in his office:)

Thanks for reading, glad you enjoyed it :)

[barefootpuddles.livejournal.com]

I love all of this but I actually think the best thing about the story has to be the title. Inspired. :)

Yeah, Wilson is just smart up to do just this....

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

Wilson is very smart indeed :) And forgiving as it turned out :)

Thanks for reading!

[cuddyclothes.livejournal.com]

Thank you for writing from Foreman's point of view! This is very funny.

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

Thank you for writing from Foreman's point of view!

I am so happy they have given Foreman a new role on the show, he really needed one :) Thanks for reading!

[deelaundry.livejournal.com]

My favorite line, absolutely perfect, is:

"If I forgave him straight away he'd think it was suspicious and spend the next six months looking for the catch. This way he'll think he's earned it and relax."

Great fic.

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

Thanks, glad you liked it :)

[brindlewolf.livejournal.com]

I LOVE THIS! <3

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

[chocolate-frapp.livejournal.com]

this is just great!

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

[palombaggia.livejournal.com]

Woaw, this is so so good.
Makes my day this morning
lovely really

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

Thanks! Glad you enjoyed it:) Thanks for reading and commenting:)

[lit-luminary.livejournal.com]

Excellent work. I love Foreman's realization that Wilson isn't as nice and harmless as he leads people to think. (Really, now. Would House have tolerated him for a minute if he were?)

Favorite lines: "If I forgave him straightaway..." because that's absolutely what would happen; House could never trust an expression of forgiveness he hadn't done something quantifiable to earn. And I laughed at Foreman's "Sometime before hell freezes over and the twelve drummers drumming appear in the hallway?" since House would definitely engage in a "Twelve Days of Christmas'-style campaign if that's what it took (although I think the twelve drummers would morph into a Mariachi band or something of the sort).

I'm not usually so fond of Foreman--it's not that I dislike him, but his character has been stagnant for too long. I liked him in tonight's episode, and I like his viewpoint here. (It's a nice observation that, unlike Cuddy, he doesn't seem to be "immune to employment laws"--interesting that PPTH is only now starting to bear a little resemblance to a realistic hospital, but I like the change.)

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

Thanks for reading, glad you enjoyed it:) No House doesn't like nice harmless people, he likes them all twisted and dysfunctional:)

House's version of Twelve Days of Christmas campaign would be a lot of fun I think :)

Foreman was great tonight, he sooo needed something to do in that show and I'm glad he's getting the opportunity, and he wasn't lording it over House which I was glad about, and I thought the show looked fresh tonight, rather than tired so I hope things are looking up!

[lit-luminary.livejournal.com]

Exactly. It takes a certain amount of dysfunction (and, I'd argue, also a certain amount of masochism) to thrive in House's orbit.

House's version of the Twelve Days of Christmas would be hilarious to read, and it would be fun for House. It would probably develop into hell for the recipient and all bystanders (particularly if he went the traditional route and included the birds),

I feel just a little hope for canon for the first time since S7 started, so fingers crossed. I did hope they'd make Foreman Dean: of all the available cast, his character and overall narrative arc are the best fit.

Foreman definitely handled things well with House--probably because he knew that if he had lorded it over him, House would've revolted on principle and gone back to prison. "Act like I can control you, for both our sakes" was a stroke of genius: it put Foreman and House on the same team, so to speak, against House's detractors--and carefully did not claim that Foreman could control House if House chose not to be controlled.

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

I did wonder how Foreman-as-Dean would go, given Foreman's spectacular failure to 'control' House twice now, I like that he realised that trying to do so wasn't going to work. They had some nice chemistry in this episode, and I've liked Foreman more since he showed concern for House in season 6 finale, season 7 opener.

Now they just have to find something better for Chase to do and I'll be happy....

[lit-luminary.livejournal.com]

Well, Foreman is smart enough to have learned from his previous spectacular failures. I like that he's trying a new approach--and the only one, really, that stands a chance of success. Because the moment it becomes a Foreman versus House power struggle, Foreman's finished (and House is back in prison). Chase is my particular favorite, but I felt a little fondness for Foreman tonight.

And yes, I want something better for Chase than sleeping his way through the entire female population of New Jersey. I'll be more than happy if he returns to the team and is himself again (i.e., not the hypermasculine, oversexed caricature S7 gave us). My view of his ultimate character arc is that he'll be the one who stays with House long enough to eventually take on students of his own, and pass on to others what he was taught. After all, it would be tragic if House's knowledge were lost when his career ended.

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

After all, it would be tragic if House's knowledge were lost when his career ended

Yes - absolutely! Once again apparently Diagnostics was completely disbanded when House was 'gone' why? Had Chase not learnt anything in 6-7 years under House? (similarly when House was in Mayfield, and the department was shut down). Okay, they may not have had House's spectacular success rate, but surely would have better than nothing...rant, rant...sorry :)

[lit-luminary.livejournal.com]

Agreed! Why should they have done that? There was the implication of financial reasons, but seven years with House (I count the one spent playing Diagnostics' personal surgeon) should have taught Chase enough to keep things going. In terms of PR, finances, whatever standard you want to measure by, it would have been better than shutting the department down altogether. (Cuddy kept it open for Foreman when House was ostensibly quitting; why shouldn't Chase have been given a chance this time?)

And anyway, textually, canon has established that Chase is the go-to for creative angles when House is indisposed; the writers should have taken that and run with it.

[blackmare.livejournal.com]

Maybe Chase was still the go-to guy but didn't want to stay and be a department head. He might have been offered it and not wanted it, for any number of reasons. Unlike Foreman, he's never seemed particularly ambitious.

[lit-luminary.livejournal.com]

Point taken. Chase values doing his job well, but he's never been interested in climbing to a more prestigious position. Still, I would like to know he was offered it, at least, for the sake of fairness and acknowledgment that he's learned a great deal in the last seven years.

[yarroway.livejournal.com]

Very funny! I do love the flamingos, but it's all good and so fitting for the characters.

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

Thanks, it was fun to write :)

[blackmare.livejournal.com]

Just now saw this and got a good laugh out of it. So much fun.

Oh, Foreman. If you haven't figured out after all these years that Wilson is not harmless, you need to go take a few more lessons from House.

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

Thanks! Glad it gave you a laugh.

Oh, Foreman. If you haven't figured out after all these years that Wilson is not harmless, you need to go take a few more lessons from House.

Very true. I wonder if we might see some Wilson/Foreman conflict this season over House...

[jezziejay.livejournal.com]

You know what you've done here? You've really made me look forward to watching ep2 on Thursday - because this is how it should be - Humbled House and manipulative Wilson (and bemused Foreman). THIS IS HOW IT SHOULD BE!!

[menolly-au.livejournal.com]

Hee - thanks! I won't say too much because you haven't seen it yet, but it's a good episode :)