Fic : Personality Types
Sep. 12th, 2012 09:29 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
menolly_auTitle: Personality Types
Characters: House/Wilson
Rating: PG-13 - mentions of sex but no action.
Spoilers: Vague references to events in the seventh season.
Words Approx 700
Warnings: None
Summary: Wilson tries to get House to take a personality type test. A dialogue fic.
A/N - Inspired by a post made by![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
barefootpuddles . Questions taken from here.
"Okay, question one..".
"Tell me again why I'm doing this?"
"We've been over this. Psych is doing a survey of the doctors in the hospital to identify what personality types they are so they can reach out to the staff and facilitate better communication between departments."
"They need a one hundred part questionnaire to tell them doctors are arrogant, self absorbed assholes?"
"They don't need a questionnaire to confirm that you fit that description..".
"So I don't need to do it..."
"... but there's more to your personality than that..."
"No, that's pretty much all there is."
"... all the doctors are doing it. Your staff have all done it."
"My staff?"
"Your minions, your slaves, your loyal subjects, the morons that work for you. Whatever term you prefer."
"You think that telling me that those idiots have done this stupid test will make me want to do it?"
"Not really, no. So what would be enough incentive for you to stir yourself to answer a few harmless questions so other people can know what makes the great Greg House tick?"
"Sex."
"Sex? That's it? Okay, I think I can manage that."
"Not just wednesday-night-bored-and-nothing-on-tv sex, but awesome mind-blowing sex. I want the neighbours banging down the doors."
"I don't do anything but awesome, mind-blowing sex, and the neighbours will get a night to talk about for the rest of their life. Okay, let's get on with..."
"And you have to wear the..."
"House! I told you I'm not wearing that again, it's embarrassing. And besides, it itches."
"Maybe you can get Taub to take the test again, I'm sure there's fifty shades of boring you can categorise him into."
" (sigh) Okay, okay. I'll wear it, but you have to answer all these questions honestly. You have to take it seriously."
"I'll take it as seriously as I took my medical boards."
"(mutters) That's what I'm afraid of. (deep breath) Okay, question one. Which of these two options describe you best : A) I have been an hospitable person and have enjoyed welcoming new friends into my life or B) I have been a private person and have not mixed much with others?
"Easy, that's A. Now give me a hard one."
"A? You enjoy welcoming new friends into your life? Seriously?"
"I welcome a lot of new friends into my life - they just don't last long."
"I have no idea why that would be. I'm putting you down for a B. Now, question two. Generally I have been a) methodical and cautious or b) adventurous and taken risks "
"A."
"You can't just keep saying A."
"I'm very methodical and cautious."
"You jumped off a balcony on the sixth floor into a swimming pool!"
"That was an aberration."
"You took an experimental drug and operated on yourself in your bathtub!"
"I methodically took an experimental drug and cautiously operated on myself in the bathtub. "
"(Sigh) I'm putting down a B. Question 3. I've been a) A bit cynical and sceptical or B) Mushy and sentimental. Don't even try and tell me B."
"I'll have you know I have a deep and sensitive soul. I'm a very caring person. I cried at the end of Bambi."
"So that's an A then."
"If you're not going to let me answer the questions why exactly are we doing this? You might as well just fill them all in yourself."
"Excellent idea. Give me a minute."
"......."
"......."
"So, what personality type am I?"
"Type ten. An arrogant, self absorbed asshole."
" I was right, as always. Let's have sex."
"Okay."
".... Wait. You already knew I wasn't going to take that test, didn't you?"
"........."
"So why did you go through all that?"
"........."
"You knew I was going to ask for sex in return."
"Did I know you were going to be a jackass about taking the test? Yes."
"You know, saying 'House, I want to have sex tonight' would have been a lot quicker."
"But not as much fun. Besides, you're forgetting what my personality type is."
"Arrogant asshole?"
"No, number eleven. Manipulative bitch."
End
Characters: House/Wilson
Rating: PG-13 - mentions of sex but no action.
Spoilers: Vague references to events in the seventh season.
Words Approx 700
Warnings: None
Summary: Wilson tries to get House to take a personality type test. A dialogue fic.
A/N - Inspired by a post made by
barefootpuddles . Questions taken from here."Okay, question one..".
"Tell me again why I'm doing this?"
"We've been over this. Psych is doing a survey of the doctors in the hospital to identify what personality types they are so they can reach out to the staff and facilitate better communication between departments."
"They need a one hundred part questionnaire to tell them doctors are arrogant, self absorbed assholes?"
"They don't need a questionnaire to confirm that you fit that description..".
"So I don't need to do it..."
"... but there's more to your personality than that..."
"No, that's pretty much all there is."
"... all the doctors are doing it. Your staff have all done it."
"My staff?"
"Your minions, your slaves, your loyal subjects, the morons that work for you. Whatever term you prefer."
"You think that telling me that those idiots have done this stupid test will make me want to do it?"
"Not really, no. So what would be enough incentive for you to stir yourself to answer a few harmless questions so other people can know what makes the great Greg House tick?"
"Sex."
"Sex? That's it? Okay, I think I can manage that."
"Not just wednesday-night-bored-and-nothing-on-tv sex, but awesome mind-blowing sex. I want the neighbours banging down the doors."
"I don't do anything but awesome, mind-blowing sex, and the neighbours will get a night to talk about for the rest of their life. Okay, let's get on with..."
"And you have to wear the..."
"House! I told you I'm not wearing that again, it's embarrassing. And besides, it itches."
"Maybe you can get Taub to take the test again, I'm sure there's fifty shades of boring you can categorise him into."
" (sigh) Okay, okay. I'll wear it, but you have to answer all these questions honestly. You have to take it seriously."
"I'll take it as seriously as I took my medical boards."
"(mutters) That's what I'm afraid of. (deep breath) Okay, question one. Which of these two options describe you best : A) I have been an hospitable person and have enjoyed welcoming new friends into my life or B) I have been a private person and have not mixed much with others?
"Easy, that's A. Now give me a hard one."
"A? You enjoy welcoming new friends into your life? Seriously?"
"I welcome a lot of new friends into my life - they just don't last long."
"I have no idea why that would be. I'm putting you down for a B. Now, question two. Generally I have been a) methodical and cautious or b) adventurous and taken risks "
"A."
"You can't just keep saying A."
"I'm very methodical and cautious."
"You jumped off a balcony on the sixth floor into a swimming pool!"
"That was an aberration."
"You took an experimental drug and operated on yourself in your bathtub!"
"I methodically took an experimental drug and cautiously operated on myself in the bathtub. "
"(Sigh) I'm putting down a B. Question 3. I've been a) A bit cynical and sceptical or B) Mushy and sentimental. Don't even try and tell me B."
"I'll have you know I have a deep and sensitive soul. I'm a very caring person. I cried at the end of Bambi."
"So that's an A then."
"If you're not going to let me answer the questions why exactly are we doing this? You might as well just fill them all in yourself."
"Excellent idea. Give me a minute."
"......."
"......."
"So, what personality type am I?"
"Type ten. An arrogant, self absorbed asshole."
" I was right, as always. Let's have sex."
"Okay."
".... Wait. You already knew I wasn't going to take that test, didn't you?"
"........."
"So why did you go through all that?"
"........."
"You knew I was going to ask for sex in return."
"Did I know you were going to be a jackass about taking the test? Yes."
"You know, saying 'House, I want to have sex tonight' would have been a lot quicker."
"But not as much fun. Besides, you're forgetting what my personality type is."
"Arrogant asshole?"
"No, number eleven. Manipulative bitch."
End
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no subject
Date: 2012-09-14 11:38 am (UTC)